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The Tentacle


October 19, 2007

Nobel, My Foot!

Edward Lulie III

Ronald Reagan never won the Nobel Peace Prize; he merely ended the Communist domination of Eastern Europe and ended the Cold War. Jimmy (Do you believe in Peanut Butter?) Carter did win the Nobel Peace Prize. Carter set the stage for the downfall of the Shah of Iran and ushered in a glorious new era of 5th century fanaticism plus helping spark the Iran-Iraq War.

Certainly the women who lost virtually all their 20th century rights must thank the Nobel Committee every day for such a wise move. Now they have chosen Al Gore and The United Nations Committee on Climate Change. The planet is saved, Al Gore wins at last.

I suspect that the qualifications for the modern Nobel Prize are simple. Winners must be:

A: Anti-American; and

B: Favored by the EU; and

C: Beloved by the Hollywood Left.

Al Gore, currently roaming the planet on his "Burned Toast" lecture series qualified easily.

His book "An Inconvenient Truth" led the way with shoddy science and false conclusions. If you disagree you are a "denier" (that would be me!).

In reality, a planet Mr. Gore rarely visits, the science that supports global warming is nowhere near any proof that mankind is a primary cause. Dr. William Gray, an expert on weather, dismissed Al Gore's conclusions in a speech at the University of North Carolina on the same day the award was announced.

Dr. Gray also predicted that we are now entering a period of cooling. He predicted as well that Gore's exaggerations and alarmism would be laughed at in a few years when they failed to come true. Time will tell.

Has mankind really messed up the planet? Sure it has. The seas are still filling up with pollutants and urban heat sinks do create localized weather changes.

Is that enough of a reason to surrender U.S. sovereignty to the United Nations? For some it is; the far left is just foaming at the mouth at the prospect of getting taxing authority over the United States. They scheme and dream of a day when the UN can tell us what we can eat, burn, drive, watch and when and how we can travel. No kidding, that's what they actually want to do.

Does the U.S. standard of living equal guilt? Must we be fair by lowering our standard of living to reach a base poverty level across the globe? I don't think so, but Al Gore does, except of course for Prize winners like himself. For him the jet, the limo and wide carbon footprint of his living conditions are excused because he's a "leader," or "cult icon," if you so choose.

So, from now until the next ice age arrives, the proponents of Global Warming will shout down arguments with pom-poms and cheerleading cries of "Nobel Prize, Nobel Prize."

Any evidence that appears to disprove GW (Global Warming) will be ignored or shouted down. Polar bears are drowning! (Due to a storm, not global warming). Katrina was more intense due to GW (no, it was a periodic storm just like prior ones we have noted in the last two hundred years).

Of course, when predicted disasters fail to materialize, you won't hear about it. For example do you remember that rash of killer hurricanes predicted to hit last year and again this year? The ones that Al claimed would be so intense and numerous because of global warming? Where are they?

Have you heard any media reports on CNN or CBS talking about how failed predictions make the science of Global Warming suspect? Nope! Not a peep. You won't either, because they are all about a political agenda and not in the least concerned with science or "truth"

The Weather Channel will probably step up its assault on Deniers. Perhaps they will give Al Gore a daily show to allow him to make planet saving tips such as these:

You can begin to save the planet by protesting any neighbor that owns a truck or SUV. Plant trees in their driveways.

Shame those planet destroyers and convince them to ride a bike for that daily 50 mile commute.

Encourage Deniers through gentle mob action to donate their savings, college funds and pension plans to Al Gore in repentance.

Have them buy a carbon offset for continuing to breathe!

Act now so that NOBEL PRIZE WINNER AL GORE can save our overheating planet BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!

Perhaps the Nobel Peace Prize Committee should chose an annual date to make their award announcements, a time that will reflect the importance, gravity and prestige due to those receiving this distinguished award.

I propose that the first day of the fourth month would be appropriate. After all, what other date could be more suitable to represent the importance of today's Nobel Peace Prize than April 1st?



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