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March 8, 2007

The Same Old Tune

Chris Cavey

Out in the great political forest of the State of Maryland there is a species that exists, commonly referred to as "The One-Note Johnnie."

You may be asking yourself, "What is a One-Note Johnnie?" Simply put, a One-Note Johnnie is a creature that is narrowly focused on just a single political issue. They can only sing a single note, which is their lone concern; however, they happily sing while throwing their babies out with the bath water.

There are many species of conservative "Johnnies." If you listen you can hear some call "Pro-life, Pro-life" or "No-slots, No-slots." Some have been known to squawk: "Taxes, taxes, taxes!" Still others coo in the cool of the evening: "Guns and ammo, Guns and ammo" just to name a few. They are all happy only with their specific song.

Last year at election time many of our birds stayed in the roost and sat very quiet complaining that their song was not heard in Annapolis. Others complained that they flew to visit Gov. Robert L. Ehrlich, Jr., and he had only a very little bit of seed in his bird feeder. So they flew home in protest, forgetting to store food for the next 40 years of winter.

Now, the first 45 days of winter are upon us and the "Johnnies" are shivering in the cold. They fly to Annapolis and the bird feeders have been taken down and replaced with cunning cats looking to chase, catch and scratch the Johnnies. At the governor's house there is only cat food.

Rainy Day funds are now being spent. Gov. Martin O'Malley openly speaks about the need to have additional revenue in the form of taxes; taxes on services, sales tax, anything to feed the needs of the "Liberal Johnnies," who are his friends.

What was once a bad idea, slots, is now a good revenue source as the issue is again on the table. Except this time it is the big dining room table of the Democrats and their need is to feed the cunning cat-like social programs, not the horseman and the breeder.

Stem-cell research that initially got a taste of funding is now on the fast track with an additional $10 million in funding. Smoking is on the way to banishment. You soon will have to purchase a clean car, no matter how much it costs.

Gun owners will suffer another blow as the assault weapon ban gains momentum with plenty of sponsors, plus a governor who especially hates the gun carrying Johnnies.

All of this turmoil has happened in just the first 45 days! There is a song which goes, in part: "Sometimes you don't know what you got 'til it's gone." Perhaps the Johnnies can each stand together and their single notes will mesh together into this chorus.

It is time to chastise these masses. Readers repent of your former sins of the voting booth. The time to literally pay the piper is upon our doorstep and in large part these political apocalypses could be your fault if you are part of - "The One Note Johnnies."

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