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As Long as We Remember...

May 1, 2006

Give Costal California to Mexico

Edward Lulie III

Bilingual education, multiculturalism, gay marriage, pacifism, anti-U.S.-Imperialism and all the "isms" progressive socialists can imagine have yet to be proved in any test environment. They'll all fail the test of time, but can we be certain?

So after considerable thought, there is a way for the left to either prove their beliefs or fail. Suppose we give California back to Mexico. Not all of it, mind you, just the land from the Golden Gate Bridge south along the coast to the Mexican border.

We'd keep the Napa Valley, Simi-Valley but they would get Los Angeles, Hollywood and San Francisco. That would place our progressive elite at the center of power for this new region and they could at last, unhindered by culture and constitution, regulate their way into progressive paradise.

Everyone would be happy; no more illegals barred from voting Democrat, or whatever that is called in Mexico, because everyone could get to vote Socialist or move away.

And, with the left's sympathy and tolerance for corruption and greed (such as in Chicago and New Orleans), there won't be any problems adjusting to the new order of the day.

We could move the United Nations to San Francisco, where it would be welcomed with open arms. The left could show the world just how successful its policies and beliefs are in action.

No guns (except for the governments, of course), no nukes and a reduced army. Unlimited action to remove all taints of counter revolutionary thought from schools. No more Fox News! No more Rush Limbaugh; and you could use modern technology to track down and catch the Neanderthals trying to listen in on unlicensed radios. Free medical care from any of the state owned doctors, who failed to catch the last plane out before the transition.

Sadly, there could be a downside. No more California electoral giant vote unbalancing U.S. elections. I know how saddened the Republican Party would be to lose the most progressive part (outside of DC) of our electorate; but, hey, they can learn to deal with the stress of being a permanent majority party.

Those progressives left in New York, Boston and Chicago might have to emigrate to benefit from the new California, at least until utopia is proven by the left to work.

The assets would all be there to work with, even with a few fleeing millionaires escaping with all their money. To help keep more wealth from escaping, we could build a nice 120-foot-high barbed wire fence, separating the old from the new; a nice parting gift from a grateful nation.

Plus, it would expand the National Football League and Major League Baseball to Mexico! Now leave the ownership of property exactly as it is, just transfer sovereignty with a national week of celebrations.

Certainly the happy progressives gaining Mexican citizenship will appreciate the way their new government respects their local customs and traditions.

By the way, just how does the traditional Roman Catholic Church in Mexico stand on issues like gay marriage and women's rights these days? I'm sure that the old macho male culture will certainly wither up and die after only a few gentle lectures from Barbara Boxer and guest feminist Hillary Clinton. This could be the chance to demonstrate progressivism's grand scheme for the future and put it into action.

Best of all for the left, no more Bush! No more struggling to lug the citizens of regressive flyover country to the future. This would be a glorious chance to build a shining temple on the coast to tell the world how it should live.

I would really miss costal California, well, then again, maybe not.

Woodsboro - Walkersville Times
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